Kindergarten Espionage
by KenSan1990
Summary: Young Kenshin and Kaoru are trying to find something to do on a rainy day....and Kaoru gets the idea to play spies and Hiko is the bad guy. AU KK


A/N: This actually came to me in a dream. It was weirder in the dream. But this'll be cute.

**Kindergarten Espionage**

"Any other day….Koshijiro….I…." Hiko was doing all he could not to blow a gasket at the man who was over the phone. You spend a few years as roommates in college then you end up babysitting their children. Hiko sighed a jagged sigh and stared at the ceiling. As if having Kenshin on his hands weren't enough trouble.

"_Please Hiko, just this once. Me and my wife are dying for a day alone. I'll even pay you if that's what it comes down to_." Hiko chewed over that offer for a moment. He glanced back to Kenshin sitting on the floor piecing together a puzzle. If it had not been raining outside, the boy would be running around outside with the other kids in the apartment complex. He shook his head; was he really that shallow? No.

"You don't have to do that. Just…bring the kid over here. If she starts causing trouble…"

"_I'll pay for anything if it gets broken; I swear_."

"Says the man who still owes me a stereo," Hiko scowled.

"_You still remember that?"_

Hiko rolled his eyes. "Just bring her. But I'm calling you the moment that she acts up."

"_Kaoru-chan's not that bad Hiko-kun, I promise_."

Hiko grunted. "Just…bring her over." Hiko immediately hung up the phone. He turned back to Kenshin. The boy's wide amethyst eyes drilled into him wanting to know what the whole phone conversation was about.

"You're gonna have a friend over," Hiko said, not wanting to reveal to an eight year old that it was a girl. Kenshin's eyes brightened.

"Really?"

"Really."

"Who?"

Hiko approached this gently. "You'll see," was his answer.

When Koshijiro and his wife arrived, Hiko could see the anxiety they had when it came to releasing her upon him. It couldn't be more apparent their wish to get on the road and back to the house. Before they left Hiko managed to say: "Careful with the Viagra."

Koshijiro didn't have the time to retort back as his wife pulled him away from the door. Hiko slammed it and turned around to the children who were staring at him rather awkwardly. He cracked a minor grin.

"If I can take care of one of you," he whispered to himself, "one more won't be so bad."

"You never said it was gonna be a girl," Kenshin whined in a disgusted tone. Kaoru was crinkling her nose just as well.

"It's just for one afternoon," Hiko said firmly, as to establish his ground like he had before. "Deal with it. The both of you."

"Daddy says you're a lazy miser," Kaoru stated in such a confident tone that Hiko was sure she knew what she was saying. He chose to ignore it for the time being thinking that getting Koshijiro back would be easier.

Hiko glanced at the clock with a sordid disposition. He knew that he would have to spend the next four to six hours with the munchkins. Not to mention try and get his work done in the process.

Kenshin and Kaoru were left to themselves in the living room while Hiko sat quietly at the table. At first they seemed like perfect little angels putting together the puzzle that Kenshin deliberately destroyed just so they would have something to do. He knew that had he not done this, Hiko would surely come after him. He was well aware of Hiko's temper.

But Kaoru didn't seem to want to play along. Halfway through, she yelled: "I'm bored!"

"How can you be bored?" Kenshin asked.

"This is boring. You do this all day?"

"It's my rainy day puzzle set," Kenshin said. Kaoru took the liberty of smashing it to pieces…again. "Hey! We were almost done!"

"So? Don't you have something better to do? Like a video game or something?"

Kenshin shook his head. There were not many gifts given in the household. The puzzle he had alone was one he had done several times before. Hiko glanced over at the two having very "friendly" argument. He smirked.

Kaoru dragged Kenshin up and pulled him into the room that she presumed was his. She was right. And she was also surprised by how nicely made up it was. It was immaculate. Not a line of crayon, or a scrap of paper anywhere. She looked over to Kenshin. His hands were folded nicely at his waist.

"You're so weird," Kaoru said, and leaned into the chest that was at the foot of Kenshin's bed. She threw things out just so she could intentionally scatter them everywhere. Once she had accomplished her task, she looked at the things that she had threw and frowned.

"More books? A few stuffed animals? Don't you have like…a pair of handcuffs and a toy gun?"

"Why would I need those?"

"To play cops and robbers you idiot!" she nearly slapped Kenshin upside of the head. She red headed boy went around collecting his things and put them back in order in his box.

"I have movies."

"I don't wanna watch a movie," Kaoru crossed her arms and fell on the floor. Kenshin followed suit. "I wanna play something like cops and robbers."

"I don't even know how to play that Kaoru-chan."

"It's not really that hard. If you're the robber you try to hide, and I have to catch you," Kaoru stated.

Hiko stood from his place and went to the children. There was a certain quiet between them. They were in a silent argument; Kaoru glaring the boy down and crossing his arms. Hiko looked back to the table where he had this things set up and then he lowered his head. He'd been worn out from the day before and could hardly keep himself awake. He opened the door.

"He doesn't know how to play cops and robbers Hiko-san," Kaoru said pointing an accusatory toward Kenshin. The boy simply muttered:

"Oro."

"You'll find something," Hiko said in a reassuring voice. "I'm gonna go lay down for a little bit," he told them. Kenshin nodded. 'Do not disturb' was Hiko's message. He walked away from the children and closed the door. Kaoru looked back down to him.

"And another thing…."

"Hey," Kenshin started. "You wanna snack?"

"Sure."

They trotted into the kitchen, Kenshin making sure that Hiko had closed his door before they did. They snuck around the corner and tiptoed to the kitchen, Kaoru obviously having done this before as well. They slipped around the corner and tumbled very nimbly into the kitchen. Hiko had not yet stirred. Kenshin opened up the fridge and let Kaoru pick out what she wanted. She reached for a juice, then immediately started searching the cabinets. Kenshin didn't dare ask her what she was looking for, and didn't have to tell her what to do. She simply shut the doors quietly until she decided that she didn't want anything. When that time came she motioned for Kenshin to come back to his room. Kenshin was confused at Kaoru had become the leader.

They sat in his room and snacked a moment. Once Kaoru got use to Kenshin's immaculate nature, she was able to really look at the things that were around her and was surprised at the different splay of personality Kenshin had. Especially by some of the scribbles that were tacked up in a nice row.

"What do you want to do Kaoru?" Kenshin asked. Kaoru took a large slurp of juice from the box and thought. All of a sudden, a light bulb seemed to flash in her mind, and Kenshin was a little scared. Kaoru saw the second chest of things in Kenshin's room labeled 'costumes'.

"Dress up?" Kenshin asked.

"Kinda."

Kenshin crawled over to the box. Kaoru immediately pulled things out and then left other things in. She paused and looked at a Darth Vader mask, then tossed it over her shoulder into a pile that Kenshin realized was all black things. Not that there were many in it. Kaoru turned to the closet and started throwing anything black in the pile.

"What are you doing?"

"I have something we can play," Kaoru stated. She felt sure they could use all the things that she had pulled out.

"What's the black for? Are we becoming ninjas?"

"No," she grinned. "Spies."

"Isn't that the same thing?" Kaoru's grin faded slowly then she shook her head.

"No. It's not."

Kenshin didn't see the need to argue and simple started donning the garments that Kaoru assigned to him. He waited patiently as Kaoru raided for a crayon and a piece of paper. She started drawing things out real intensely, not that it really made much more sense then Kenshin's scribbles.

"What is that?" Kenshin squinted to try and figure out what it was. "Is that a cat?"

"No, that's the bad guy," Kaoru said pointing out the door.

"Hiko?"

"Duh," she rolled her eyes. "See, this is what we have to do…." she trailed off. "What's in Hiko-san's room to steal?"

"Um….I don't know. I really never go in there."

Kaoru rolled her shoulders. "Well then, let's make it a heavily guarded fort."

"Okay. So why are we going in here?""To prove our worth."

Kenshin nodded. "And what if Hiko-san catches us?"

Kaoru shrugged. "We'll fight him. You have a light saber to go along with these things?" she asked pulling on the Darth Vader costume.

"No. Can I have the mask?" he asked in a whiney voice. Kaoru rolled her eyes and handed it over. Kenshin glanced up to his window. It was still raining real heavily.

"Okay Kenshin, this might be a sewey-site mission."

"What's that?"

"I don't know; I heard it on T.V. Anyways, it is, so be very careful."

"Okay," he leaned in real secretively. "What do you want me to do?"

"Well, first we need supplies," she said. Kenshin pointed to the mask that he had placed on his head. "Other than our clothes."

"Like what?"

"Let's see. We need some rope…." she dug through his toy chest again, producing the jump ropes that she had scattered earlier. "And we need a weapon in case…."

"I have a bokken around here somewhere," Kenshin dug under his bed and produced a bokken for Kaoru. She took it full of pride.

"Anything else under that bed?"

"Uhm…."Kenshin dug out a few things. "My rock collection."

"Great. Smoke bombs."

"What kind of T.V. do you watch Kaoru-chan?"

"Dad's into these old war movies."

"Hiko doesn't really watch a lot of T.V. He says it's corrupting."

"Yeah…" Kaoru sighed. "Mom says that too. Well, we can't all think the same. I like Dad's movies. Except they never have a woman lead. We're strong aren't we?" Kaoru posed like a mighty superhero. Kenshin shrugged.

"You want to use my rock collection?"

"How many you got?"

"Dunno. Some I've found around," Kaoru opened the box and grinned.

Later (about two hours of getting side-tracked and arguing) they were suited up and ready to go. Kenshin fumbled around with his costume that felt a little too much, but Kaoru was very nimble (with the help of her big brains, as she said). They looked out the door, Kaoru being very cautious of what she saw. Kenshin wanted to go on, but she pushed him back.

"Watch the mines," she said squinting her eyes. "There's a pack of bloodthirsty wolves."

"Where?" All Kenshin saw was a little cat which he had picked up and Hiko reluctantly let him keep.

"There you moron!" Kaoru griped.

"The cat?"

"Learn to play pretend," Kaoru snapped. Kenshin covered his head. "You are the worst spy ever."

"I'm proving my worth remember?" Kenshin reminded. Kaoru rolled her shoulders and pushed him out.

Kenshin acted very nimbly for the situation at hand, not that it was really manly. Kaoru was sure it was some sort of ballet and she told herself to ask him later. But they way she saw the field seemed to be the way that Kenshin saw it. She perked up.

"Watch out for the north tower! They'll see you!" she howled, pointing obviously to the lamp. Kenshin nodded….duck and WOOSH! He was on the couch crawling around like a spider. Kaoru carefully followed behind hitching one of the long jump ropes over her shoulder. She was on the couch next to Kenshin. They peeked above it looking at the cat licking its paw.

"What do we do for the wolves?"

"We need meat."

"We don't have meat."

"That's what the fridge is for."

"Hiko'll kill me!"

"Who's this 'Hiko' you speak of? You mean the lord of the fort?"

"Well…yes…."

"Forget it. We kill him!"

"Kaoru-chan…"

"I am not Kaoru-chan! I am Jezebel! Warrior princess-spy!"

"Of course you are," Kenshin sighed.

"Now, onto the fort!"

"We're not at the fort?"

"We're not IN the fort."

"What about the meat?"

"What meat?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Let's go! I'll beat off the dogs! If we get hurt…we'll just have to go on."

"We didn't pack first aid?"

"…" Kaoru looked at the cat. She lunged over the couch with her bokken poised in one hand and in the other was a set of Kenshin's rocks. She chucked a few of the rocks toward the cat, and then pointed her bokken much like a gun. The cat went away from her in a fury and toward Kenshin who had carefully climbed over the couch. Kenshin shield himself and kicked not intentionally trying to strike the cat. The cat tried clawing at his leg and Kenshin shook it off until it ran into his room. Kaoru put a thumbs up.

"Good job! Are you hurt?"

"I think he ripped my pants."

"Worry about your pants later. Are you hurt?"

Kenshin shook his head.

"Now; here we are," Kaoru looked at Hiko's door with the strongest face she could muster. It was slightly cracked open and Kenshin could see Hiko lying over the bed rather haphazardly.

"We're not supposed to go in there."

"Why not? You want to be considered worthless?"

"Well…no…but Hiko's sleep…."

"Who is this Hiko you keep speaking of? Leave your mother at home soldier!"

Kenshin didn't cower, only clenched his fists knowing that he was not suppose to hit a girl. Kaoru narrowly opened the door. It didn't creak. She motioned for Kenshin to get on the ground. They did and they started to crawl across the small space. Compared to Kenshin's room, Hiko's was a sheer mess of clothes and papers. The man was a very silent and still sleeper. Kenshin peeked up at his foot narrowly hanging off the bed. Kaoru worked her way around to the side that Hiko didn't occupy and poked up over the side. Hiko's head was turned the other way. She motioned for Kenshin to follow. He did, and they both looked at Hiko. His hand twitched.

"One my mark…." she whispered. "Three…two….one…" she brought her hand down and crawled up on the bed as quickly as she could. She brought out her rope and put it around Hiko's wide torso. His eyes snapped over and he flung up giving her equal opportunity to wrap it around. She motioned for Kenshin to follow up.

"Tie his hands!"

"What are you munchkins doing?" Kenshin tentatively did as Kaoru told him. "Kenshin…"

"We will defeat you vile lord!" Kaoru yelled. It took Hiko a second, and even at that he didn't really give in. He fought with the confinement that the children were trying to put him in.

"This isn't funny!" he howled. Where his long hair was caught within the knotted ropes, if he moved his head around, it would pull the hairs. Hiko stood up dragging the children with him. Kenshin and Kaoru collided harshly. They never let go.

"Hey watch where you're going!" Kaoru yelled. She forced herself to pull harder on the rope around Hiko. He seemed to catch on quick.

"What are you doing in my sanctuary?" he roared hatefully. Kenshin cowered a bit at Hiko's voice. He swung around like an angered bull. Kenshin and Kaoru were trying their hardest to not to knock into each other or into things around them. As they stumbled out the door, Kenshin noticed that Hiko was getting very close to breaking the ropes. Not only that but he was getting dangerously close to the "bombs" that Kaoru had thrown.

"Son of a…."Hiko hopped on one foot when a rock that wasn't so dull nearly pierced through his sock. "What the hell is on the floor?"

"You need to be careful of your own traps vile one!" Kaoru shouted. Kenshin fell back when his jump rope snapped. Hiko tumbled over.

"Get him Kenshin! This is your chance!" Kaoru roared. The red head contemplated a moment.

"Try me kid," Hiko seemed to have a real anger in him. Despite that, Kenshin hopped on his caretaker's back, took the broken rope and tried to still tie it around his thick wrists. Hiko didn't writhe as much as Kenshin thought he would. He still went to rise; Kaoru sat on his legs hoping to counteract that one. She took the other side of the rope and tried to tie his ankles together. Hiko fussed this time.

"I don't think so!" he eased up onto his knees sending Kaoru toppling over onto her back. He was right in Kenshin's face. The boy cowered a moment at him, but showed a sturdy face when looking at Kaoru.

"Evil one!" Kenshin proclaimed.

"I'll make you think 'evil one'."Hiko started chasing Kenshin around the small living room after he'd gotten loose of the rope. Kaoru collected the rocks and the bokken following the two into the living room; she poised the bokken at Hiko as though she were calling her shot in baseball.

"Evil one! You will be defeated for the sake of honor!" Kaoru chucked one rock at him. Hiko turned around. When she threw another rock, it hit the wall and shattered. Kenshin stopped.

"Hey! That's mine!" he said defensively. Two pairs of eyes were on him. Kenshin looked at the rock with sad eyes. "You meanie!"

"I see a change in tide," Hiko commented to himself stepping to the side. Kenshin began an argument with Kaoru trying to hold back his clenching fists. They were in each others' faces shortly. They butted heads and growled at one another. Kaoru threw the first punch hitting Kenshin square in the jaw. He went down, grabbing her bow in the process. Kaoru toppled onto him.

"Hey! You're gonna rip it!"

"Maybe I should!"

"Maybe I won't let you."

They simultaneously stuck out their tongues. Kenshin brought his head up quickly. Kaoru gripped her face a moment. She swung back at Kenshin. Hiko sat in the chair and monitored the childish fist fight. They kept falling on each other, but it was apparent that they both had training.

An hour later, they both sat in a chairs being tended to. Kenshin had his head held back and had his nose covered with a tissue. He didn't cry. Hiko was careful when it came to caring for both. They didn't look at each other, and only spoke when it came to arguing with each other. There was a knock at the door. Hiko stood up and went over.

"Hey."

Koshijiro was alone, and looking especially happy.

"Did you have a good time?" Hiko asked.

"Yeah."

"Good."

"How was she?" Hiko moved out of the doorway to show the girl with crossed arms and Kenshin holding a bloody nose back.

"Oh dear."

"They got a little into it."

"…you're not a good spy…"

"You're loud!"

"You're a scardy cat!" They stuck out their tongues.

"What'd they do?"

"Nothing. Just….being kids right?"

"I came home all the time with scrapes on my knees."

"I call it love."

"I call you an idiot."

"Says the man who _still_ owes me the stereo."

"Will you drop that?"

Hiko shrugged and called Kaoru over. The children shoved each other one more time for good measure. Kaoru walked away saying: "I hate your guts."

"Same!"

Koshijiro shook his head as he grabbed his daughter's hand.

Hiko went back inside. "You still bleeding?"

Kenshin took off the tissue. "No."

"Go wash off your face."

"Yes," as he walked away he asked: "Hiko?"

"Yes?"

"Can she come over again?"

A/N: Kids….tell me what you think. KenSan out!


End file.
